Detail's Magazine - Influences readers with key word
instructions on how to not be. Often popular with "Crackers"
Detail's dark, edgey, vindictive, hateful, almost
jealous let's not mention yet communist overtone with a disgustingly
psychotic influence of left over fake blood from the film American
Psycho saturating the pages of its wanabee sheik killer/spy
magazine, it's cheese that needs to be cut. Although this particular
article doesn't express why Korrekt feels the way we do about
Details, hopefully we will get a chance to show some examples of
Details Magazine writers knitting and word weaving of a different
kind, they can sit in a corner with a dunce cap of corruption. This
fashion tip is more like an instruction for insiders, sorry we have
to sink to their level.
|From Detail Magazine June - July 2005.
Lose the Ski Hat
The classic wool cap is
great look-for the slopes. But everything changes the minute you
step in from the cold.
WHITE PEOPLE. SIGH. WE TAKE SOMETHING
GRITTY AND HIP-RAP, HARLEM, CHRIS ROCK
suck its soul dry until the remaining corpse is as pale
as suburban Salt Lake City. The latest slice of
life to be crackered.? Call it whatever you like-skully, beanie, ski hat.
All we see is a high-price
hairnet. The worst offenders are the
Sherpa set, who insist on wearing wool caps. Indoors. In the
of summer. Hey, Nanook, this is SoHo, not Siberia. So unless your
name is The Edge (or
you're pointing your prayer rug to Mecca), you're gonna want to take that doily off your
In the days of Marvin Gaye and Miles
Davis, shaggy, hand-knit caps advertised a groovy bit of bohemian
flair. These hats were symbolic: genius just barely tamed; a wild
man making himself presentable.
Now who wears them? Every
celebri-bot with a BlackBerry and porcelain veneers who's itching
for a little grit. Straight outta Silverlake, crazy muthafucka named
Timberlake. Yeah, right. Hey, Justin, haven't you heard? Your ghetto
pass has been revoked. And Ashton, we know you've been pussy-whipped
into Kabbalah, but that's no yarmulke. Enrique wears a crocheted
model that would be more at home underneath Grandmaw's candy dish.
And if Colin Farrell spent as much time wrapping the head in his
pants as the one on his shoulders, he might not be shelling out
"Basically, anyone who was ever in
the Mickey Mouse Club is now walking around dressed as if they're a
gangsta rapper from South Central," says style arbiter and author
Simon Doonan. "It's a desperate attempt to have street cred and
avoid being perceived as a cheesy entertainer."
But still they come, ready to skulk
to the next premiere-or knock over the local Git-n-Split.
Singer-songwriter Gavin DeGraw (the voice of One TreeHill) says his
allegiance to the head ornament is purely cosmetic. "I think you
look more handsome with it," he explains. "It borders your face and
eyes. You can choose whatever color is proper for your skin tone.
From artists to bank robbers, it's pretty universal." DeGraw pulls
it off better than most. But until he set me straight, I assumed he
was bald, or at least suffering from a little deforestation. Wear
the shag rag too often and it looks like a not-sostealthy way of
ushering in those new plugs.
"I suppose it's good for people who
don't have hair and want to hide the fact," says Michael Bragg,
director of communications for natty clothier Thomas Pink. "But what
happens when you walk into
a restaurant? I mean, proper manners say you have to take off your
Listen, you really want to cover
your head with something nice? Get a haircut. If heredity has denied
you that option, invest in a razor and a little Turtle Wax. Bruce
Willis has been losing real estate since Die Hard, but even at 5o he
can still find himself tongue-bathing Lindsay Lohan. (At least,
that's what we'd like to believe.) And where is her ex, Wilmer
Valderrama, the Poncherello look-alike with a laughable affinity for
the brain cozy?
Ostracized. Typecast. And probably sobbing quietly into his skully.
82 DETAILS JUNE